Junkie

Ok – I have a problem.  I admit it.  I like gadgets, I like electronics, I like junk.  I’m a junkie.  This week’s obsession is the HTC Touch.

I’ve had my cell phone for 3 years now.  It’s a Kyocera Slider and, although much maligned, it works fine for me.  A while ago it got wet while I had it in my pocket in the rain (in a case, in my pocket.  Who would have expected that!?).  I dried it out in front of the dehumidifier for a couple of days, and it would work but wouldn’t always ring when I got a call.  So I began to gird my loins in preparation for cell failure and started looking at the phone offerings.  But my Slider kept working, and now rings when I get a call.  Sometimes I can’t get into my menu – the ok button won’t work.  But I just restart the phone and its all good.

The damage had been done, however, in that I had begun to cast me eye.  Hype about an upcoming phone would get me excited, but then I’d see the phone in person and meh, not worth switching.  The latest was Motorola’s Razr2.  It sounded like everything I’d want.  But it’s horrendously expensive, and in person it’s not so attractive.

Instead, the LG Shine clamshell fits my hand better, looks a hell of a lot nicer (in person. The Motor Razr2 looks great in pictures though), and is at a better price point.  But then there’s this HTC Touch.  It marries a pocket pc with a cell phone and I can get online without having to buy a data plan (it can be used with just the regular mobile browser). 

I had been using a Palm PDA a number of years ago (again, that gadget fixation), but was frustrated by the way the memory would wipe when the batteries died.  When S got her Axim, it dealt well with this issue plus she bought excellent calendar software (pocket informant), and recharging the Axim battery was easier than popping rechargeables into a Palm.  But I didn’t want an Axim – I had no need for all that oomph just to use it as a daytimer. Besides, who wants to carry around a separate phone,  PDA,  iPod, and umbrella.

The Touch, though, would have PDA functionality, mobile phone functionality, plus let me check my gmail etc. 

Does it sound like I’m trying to talk myself into buying one?  Maybe.

But I also hear that the thing freezes up on some people - even in the middle of a phone call.  Or it doesn’t let you know you’re receiving a call and just leaves you with messages in your in-box.  Is this typical for the unit,  are these just lemons, or is it resulting from a particular style of use?

Maybe I’d just be better off with a phone and the $5 Grand and Toy datebook I use.

Goodfellow

There’s a lot to planning even a casual wedding. 

It’s not like I’m one of those women who had their entire wedding planned by the time they were 12.  I don’t look at Bride magazines, or get the urge to attend a Bridal show.  Weddings, on the main, fly quite under my radar.  Occasionally,  I notice formally dressed people milling about in front of a church and I assume there’s a wedding happening.  There was a time when I had to quash the urge to  yell out “It’s not too late to change your mind!”.  But I seem to be over that. 

Another step on the road to matrimony, S and I have to select a wedding officiant.  Through the miracle of Google, I have found a number of authorized officiants in the Toronto area.  I have also reviewed a number of sample weddings.  The closest to anything I liked was a handfasting ritual.  That was until I ran across a sample ceremony on a Humanist officiant’s website. 

If I was a bell, I would have rung when I read it.  The officiant was Martin Frith, and it’s not that I’m a man hater, but both S and I (independantly, it turned out) envisioned a female officiant.  So I showed S a variety of other officiants – too many, perhaps.  She asked which one I was leaning toward, so I pointed out Roben Goodfellow.

We arranged to meet her, so we could get a feel for her before we committed to anything.  Within 30 seconds I was sold.  When she went into the kitchen to get us coffee, S and I looked at each other and agreed that yep, she was the one.  Relaxed, Professional, and Fun… and Experienced, and  Knowledgeable, and Fun.   I’m sure we’re in good hands.

We’ve shared the Frith sample with her, and she took notes while we chatted over coffee, laughing and going off on tangents for 3 hours (honestly, it only felt like 1).  She’ll send us a draft of something that S and I can tinker with.  I hope we like it!

Feelin’ the Love

Lil Sis and S really rallied around me this weekend, both offering support.  

Lil Sis sent me an email listing off how she’d like to help and I cried when I read it.   And she wasn’t at all weird with me when she surfaced later in the day, but instead offered to help me fix the upstairs window. Oh – and she burned me another CD.

S was supportive and we discussed various options.  It’s nice that we’ve made this safe place to be able to share stuff.  Unfortunately, she then made a to-do list for us.  Her view was that taking it out of your head and putting it on paper makes the noise in the head stop.  I understand that point of view, but disagree that a page long to-do list makes me feel more relaxed!

Overall, a good weekend.

Oh – and S and I worked at getting the router’s security setting fixed… with the help of the 1-800 #.  You know, you research a potential wireless router, make sure you’re buying the most modern version with the strongest security functionality, and then find out that WPA doesn’t really work well with the laptop.  So no wonder we couldn’t get it to work.  The 1-800 guy had us use the lesser WEP and voila – security (albeit a lesser standard).  Who needs high standards, anyway?

Splatter patterns

Last night I took the time to examine why the icon on S’s laptop showing the wireless internet connection looked different than usual/  I noticed it a couple of days ago, but didn’t examine it further.

Turns out all the work I put into setting the router up with WAP2 encryption was somehow undone in the last few days.  I don’t know why it’s been fine for over a year, then it just decided to revert back to factory settings – no security, not even a firewall.  I’m not able to believe, yet, that it just did it on its own… because it was bored or throwing some sort of streaming tantrum.

So I looked for the box the router came in, with the manual and all the notes I took, and the start-up software.  Couldn’t find it.  No one could find it.  And believe me, S and Lil Sis were looking for it like crazy because my head was clearly about to explode.

Meanwhile, I accessed the online admin server and tried to set new security settings.  I used a string of arcane varied characters for my password.  This of course kicked me off my connection, because it now wanted a password before I could access it again.  No problem, because I had not only just written down the 30 plus digit password, but I also MEMORIZED the fucking thing (not to mention I blocked and copied it).  But no – this was not the password it was looking for.  WTF?

So I fucked around with it for a while, while everyone around me kept very very quiet.  I made multiple trips downstairs to the router to reset it.  And tried all sorts of things – none of which worked.

So hey, come on by to my neighbourhood and enjoy free internet access!  Maybe try to glean my banking information while you’re at it. Except that until it’s sorted out, I won’t be doing anything remotely financial with the computer.

Between this, the light fixture shorting out, and pretty much every item of furniture, electronics or floor covering I own slowly being destroyed - plus work stress, gallbladder stress, and wedding planning stress – I’ve pretty much had it for now.  Someone else can take a crack at restoring the security settings to the router.  I’m on holiday.

Facebook

Ok – so I signed up for Facebook last night. 

S’s sister loves Facebook and finds it the best way to communicate with people. She suggested I get a Facebook account so she and I could plan S’s “bachelorette” party.  More specifically, she suggested I open an account for this purpose then delete it after the wedding.  

Lil Sis laughed and said “you’ve secretly wanted to be on Facebook and you’re just using this as an excuse”.  But there was something accusatory about the way she said it.  I laughed back “I want to get onto Facebook so I can snoop on you”, incase that would elicit a response.  It didn’t, although she joked about limiting my access to her profile. 

She went downstairs to her computer and added me as a friend.  So I looked at her profile and asked her about a particular application she had (Human Pets).  She said with irritation “don’t sign up for that!”.

So yep – I think maybe she feels I’m stepping onto her turf, invading her privacy.  I think I’ll address it with her more fully tonight. 

On a related note, has regular email become that “old school” already? 

Some Purdy Rings

Another wedding, another wedding band.

I have some favourite jewellers in Toronto.  Not that I actually buy much jewellery.  A trio of jewellers used to always attend the One of a Kind Craft Show and Sale every November.  Experimetal, Shelly Purdy, and Hasler & Kim.  It’s very difficult to go past the Hasler & Kim booth without Helen Kim managing to get you to buy something.  She’s smooooth.

A few years ago, I went to Experimetal’s and Shelly Purdy’s retail studios because I wanted to buy myself a nice ring.  One of those “right hand rings” jewellers are encouraging women to buy.  Sister are doin’ it for themselves!

I didn’t end up getting one made, though.

So now S and I are going around to look for wedding rings.  First stop was Experimetal.  We found some that we liked ok.  But they were only ok.  We went to Hasler & Kim’s studio – but it was closed for a few weeks    (so we went to Whole Foods instead.  My first time in there.  Wow – what a place.  I loved it!).  Lastly, we went to Shelly Purdy’s studio… only it wasn’t there anymore, although her website was still up and running and showed the Richmond St address.

I called and left a message at the number for the studio, but a few days passed and I received no response.  I tried again on her cell phone and there she was.  Turns out she isn’t in the retail business anymore.  And she won’t be doing the OOAK this year.  Instead, she’s focusing on wholesale.  But, she will still do custom orders.  So we arranged to meet her, at a restaurant (?).

We found rings of hers that we liked, but wanted to modify them to look more similar to one another.  So she gave us a quote for the modified rings and we got Li’l Sis to photoshop pics of them so we could figure out what the end result might look like.  Meanwhile, I ran across this place online and totally fell in love with his rings.  Totally.  They are everything I love about Klimt and Norval Morriseau.  But they aren’t sold in Canada, and I’m not keen on buying one mail order. Especially since both S and I have seen rings we loved online, only to not like them in person.

So instead, we met Shelly Purdy again, at another restaurant, and agreed to buy custom rings from her.  Each white gold with diamonds, hand engraved with a acanthus motif.

Should I be wary of buying expensive jewellery from a woman who operates out of restaurants?  Should I be wary of contracting to buy a ring sight unseen ( Although we have seen her work up close and personal, we’re only guessing at what the finished version might look like)?    Hopefully it will work out alright!   Aauuugh!

Snowbird

Andy Barrie interviewed Anne Murray on Metro Morning today.  I guess someone thought it would be quite the coup if he could get her to out herself on his program.  It was fun to listen to him broach the topic.

Her new album is a duets album.  Andy noted that the album contained love songs sung from one woman to another, when we’re used to hearing them sung between a man and a woman.  He said “I thought that would be a window into the women who had been in your life…. beginning with your mom.”  So- start talking about love songs sung between women, ask her about the women in her life – then back off by referring to her mom.

The he starts along this lesbian pre-amble, noting that kd lang has professed to have a crush on Anne when she was 9, “before she knew she was going to grow up to be gay – pre sexual.  When you were a little girl, who were the women that you worshipped?”  

He noted that she sings duets with kd lang, who is out and proudly so, and Dusty Springfield who performed in a time when it wasn’t ok to be out. He reflected on the album and said ”I think of how it will be emraced by women who love women as adults”.

He mentioned the song “You Needed Me” , that she sings with Shania Twain, seeing it becoming “an anthem for the people who celebrate the connection between women.”  

It was fun listening to him have a go at it,  but ”women who love women as adults”??

Was he not allowed to use the world “lesbian”?

And here’s a little treat for you Man Murray fans…

Why Hast Thou Foresaken Me?

I read that television writers went on strike this week.  It made me wonder when I’d notice a change in my television options.  Then it occurred to me – are you sure they haven’t been on strike for a longer than a week?  Because really, this season’s television shows are, in a word, crap.

Last year, I found that each day there’d be shows I wanted to see during the same time slot.  My VCR was always running.  Prison Break, Heroes, Lost, House, Grey’s Anatomy, CSI, ER, Jericho, Medium, Desperate Housewives…  But this year I’m pretty indifferent to the offerings.

The networks cancelled both Jericho and Medium.  And what do they have that’s “new”?  Bionic Woman.  I watched two episodes, trying to give it a chance.  But it is so egregiously crappy that it’s unwatchable.  Women’s Murder Club?  Bad, bad, bad. How can they justify cancelling decent shows (even though Jericho was, admittedly, over the top with the rah-rah USA of it all) only to replace them with utter dross?

Pushing Daisies is cute, but it gets tired quickly. I like How I Met Your Mother, but not enough to tape it if I’m not home that night.  I don’t watch Prison Break this season.  Heroes is only ok.  Lost isn’t back yet (is it coming back?).  Grey’s Anatomy is boring.  House is boring, ER is boring (ok – it was boring last year too), Desperate Housewives is boring. CSI – boring (ok Jorja Fox will be leaving, we get it.) 

Which makes me wonder, have the writers been secretly on strike for quite a while now?

Killer Fajitas

Ok – so I have gallstones.  It sounds so middle-aged North American of me – but hey, I am a middle aged North American.  Unfortunately, I’ve been living with these bastards for around 12 years now.  I wasn’t “fat, forty, fair and farting” then.  But I digress.

Sunday S, Lil Sis and I went to see a movie then had dinner afterwards.  We shared an order of fajitas and 2 lbs of chicken wings.  I ate a few of the wings, but not as much as S and Lil Sis.  Instead, I focussed on the fajitas.  I assumed they’d be  a more relatively healthy meal choice.  Nonetheless, I was up virtually all night with unfortunate gastric pain.

I happened to be reading the Globe and Mail today and ran across an article talking about the levels of calories, fat and sodium in restaurant meals.  While fast food restaurants post nutritional information, most regular restaurants do not.  The Globe and Mail and Canada AM commissioned a study of popular meals at 4 different restaurants.   One of the meals was chicken fajitas.  It has 1429 calories, 38.5 grams of fat and 4450 milligrams of sodium.  You’d figure anything that salty would be  next to impossible to eat.

A Big Mac and an order of fries comes in as a lighter choice than the fajitas meal.  Of course, there’s a lot more food in the fajitas meal.  In our case, the meal was split between 3 people (should I be mentioning the popcorn I had at the movie theatre?).

 Here’s an excerpt from the CTV website :

To put the following numbers in perspective, consider the average adult needs about 2000 calories and no more than 65 grams of fat and 20 grams of saturated fat, and no more than 2300 milligrams of sodium per day.

Milestone’s	Calories	Fat (g)	Sat. Fat (g)	Sodium (mg)
Appetizer: Milestone’s Hot Spinach/Artichoke Dip (1/2)	389	21.7	8.2	608.5
Roasted Chicken Penne Asiago	1205	59.5	17.7	1869
Iced tea, 10 oz.	107	0	0	64
Mexican Chocolate cake with ice cream (1/2 portion)	355	20.5	9	31.6
TOTAL FOR MEAL	2056	101.7	34.9	2573.1

Dips are supposed to be fattening, so no surprise there. But who have thought that a pasta entrée – with chicken breast, roasted tomatoes and spinach – could deliver as many calories and as much fat as two Big Mac’s. And thanks to the Asiago cream, you’re getting almost a day’s worth of artery-clogging saturated fat. This meal clocks in at 2056 calories and provides more than a day’s worth of sodium and almost two days worth of saturated fat.

Kelsey’s	Calories	Fat (g)	Sat. Fat (g)	Sodium (mg)
Appetizer: Kelsey’s Loaded Nachos (1/2 portion)	1008.5	55	19	1992
Chicken Fajitas	1429	38.5	17.4	4450
Regular Beer, 1 pint (473 ml)	204	0	0	19
TOTAL FOR MEAL	2641.5	93.5	36.4	6461

Eat this meal and be prepared to power walk for at least six hours on the treadmill to burn the calories off. And no, the sodium numbers are not a typo. Salty chips and fajita seasoning make this meal a health hazard for anyone with high blood pressure. In just one meal, you’re getting a day’s worth of fat, two day’s worth of saturated fat and nearly three days worth of sodium. Ouch.

The Keg	Calories	Fat (g)	Sat. Fat (g)	Sodium (mg)
Appetizer: Scallops & Bacon (1/2 portion)	103	3.8	1.2	446
Sourdough bread w/ butter (1/4 portion)	178	3.2	1.8	419
Keg Classic Dinner	1161	55	22.7	1664
Red wine, 9 oz.	217	0	0	0
Chocolate Mousse Pyramid	261	16.3	11.3	31.4
TOTAL FOR MEAL	1920	78.3	37	2560.4

On a hypothetical date, you share an appetizer, have two pieces of bread, sip on a glass of wine, order the New York Keg Classic Dinner – an 10 ounce steak served with Caesar salad, vegetables and a Keg Size baked potato – and follow with dessert. The damage? Far more calories, fat and sodium than anyone needs in one meal. Eat out like this once a week and you’ll end up gaining 20 pounds per year.

Jack Astor’s	Calories	Fat (g)	Sat. Fat (g)	Sodium (mg)
Appetizer: Roasted Garlic Bruschetta (2 pieces)	325	15.5	2.8	884
Key West Salad w/ Chicken, dressing on the side	273	11.1	1.8	245
White wine, 6 ounce	146	0	0	0
TOTAL FOR MEAL	744	26.6	4.6	1129

If you’re careful, you can order a meal that doesn’t send your diet in a tailspin. This entrée salad with grilled chicken, avocado and roasted nuts – drizzled with only one tablespoon (15 ml) of dressing – comes in at a respectable 273 calories. Even with two pieces of bruschetta, this meal is pretty decent on calories and fat. The only downside: half a day’s worth of sodium in one meal.

Bon appetit!

Bridey

So here I am, looking at wedding band designs, thinking about flower arrangements, talking about wedding cake alternatives — all that girly “Bride” stuff.  And I’m oddly excited about it all  (and I don’t think it’s just because it’s giving me an excuse to shop for things).  I think my enthusiasm is fantastic, considering my general anti-marriage views.

I’m trying to remember if I had enthusiasm the last time around.  I don’t recall it.  Not that I was moping through it.  It was just the next step.  Get an education, get a job,  get married, have kids.  It was part of the path trodden by generations before me because it was the thing to do, the thing that was supposed to translate into a good life, happiness, security.

I didn’t feel any different after I was married than I did before I was married, except perhaps that I felt more “respectable” (instead of “living in sin”), more accepted, part of the establishment, part of the legion of people following the path. 

But the path didn’t work for me.  Living the straight life didn’t work for me.  I was never really accepted into it anyway — so much for choice.

Lynn the lesbian doesn’t worry about being seen as respectable.  I embrace my deviations.  They really work for me.  My life really works for me.  This time around, marriage feels like it will bring with it a shift toward permanance.  Not that being married is a permanant state — just look at the statistics.  But I’m feeling a shift from just letting life’s current carry me from one day into the next. I’m making a choice to take this thing S and I create (the marriage) and help to keep it afloat.  To actually cleave to one another, to resist separation.

You’d think that planning to have children together would have had a similar effect, but it didn’t (not for me anyway).  Having a child is making a choice to parent a child, not necessarily making a deliberate and mindful choice to resist separation from the other parent.  That part still seemed to follow the “life’s current” concept, and the assumption that the current wouldn’t carry me far away.

But you know what they say about assumptions.